rolling the ball

One of the problems I face every time I think of this blog (which would be several times a day) is that there is SO much to share & write that I don't even know where to start.

But a number of questions seem to be on everybody's minds, so here's an attempt at answering a few:

1. How's your Dad? He's doing as well as could be expected; even better. I'm so proud of him. Funny thing to say about a parent perhaps, but it's true that we're reaching that age when the roles begin to reverse. In any case, he's found comfort in time if not solace from grief. His cooking in particular has vastly improved -- and he wasn't half bad to begin with. There's a quiet confidence stirring in him now which is wonderful to see.

2. Is he moving to the States? Ah, such a simple question, fraught with complications. This is certainly a possibility, but a) I've decided not to make or ask others to make big decisions until at least a year has passed since my mother's death, and b) it's really, really not that easy -- mainly because neither my father nor I have U.S. citizenship (I'm on a Green Card now, and my dad's a Bolivian citizen with a permanent residency permit in Japan). And to get U.S. citizenship (to sponsor my father's immigration) I'd have to give up my Japanese citizenship, which I'm not ready to do (never mind the logistical nightmares involving my assests now in Japan). More on this conundrum later.

3. How's the store? Mark has been spending almost all of his time in LA, with Elliot, researching many a possible storefront. All brokers/owners they've met have been superenthusiastic about the business proposal, and they've come close with several negotiations. But each spot so far has had some dealbreaker, like not enough parking (as determined by strict city regulations based on the usage, size and location of the property. That's about all I can understand). We're coming down to the wire, though, and it's turning into a rollercoaster ride -- which hopefully I can start reporting about in real time. Now they're in negotiations on the best location by far -- won't say where just now so as not to jinx it -- and I just have my fingers crossed. If I didn't know better I'd say we should tape this all for a reality show.

4. When are you moving? Where will you live? Mark is pretty much there, staying with his brother Dave, but only with his computer and a few clothes. So I, the cats, and our worldly possessions will be moving cross-country...probably in mid-June. I have a big RCCNY concert at Carnegie Hall on June 5th, and I'm planning on going back to Tokyo again at the end of June/beginning of July for my mom's 1-year anniversary memorial service, which makes mid-June the most practical time to move. We'll rent a place in LA somewhere near the store, hopefully somewhere on the West Side. Just need to give our CT landlady 2 months' notice -- which means giving notice in less than a month. Yikes. La la la la la la la la...

5. Will you work at the store, or...?? I finally bit the bullet and told my bosses and colleagues about the "possible" move to LA (some denial there still, yes -- what can I say, I'm conflicted). Everyone is supportive across the board, and since our show just got renewed for another season (now airing on TLC, by the way -- millions more viewers like you!), they'd definitely like to keep me writing and editing. Either way it will be great to have that steady income until the store's raking in $$. The big question is whether they'll keep me on as an employee even after I leave New York, or if they'll cut my benefits and have me go freelance (though I'd request a higher salary to compensate). We'll see.

6. How are you? WHERE are you? I'm back now from a 3-week trip in Tokyo, during which I spent more than $80,000 of what was once my mother's money. WHOO! It all went to income taxes, construction fees (we had to convert half our garden into a 3-car lot adjacent to the business rental property -- long story), accountant and property lawyer fees, property deed filing taxes... BOOO!!

7. Are you guys still trying? The short answer is yes, and I've been going to regular acupuncture sessions with a doctor prescribing herbal teas and such too. But really I can't imagine going through more "serious" treatment now and starting up with a new doctor (our company health insurance changed YET AGAIN, and the new provider is practically the only one that my OBGYN of 6 years does NOT take).....only to move and have to explain the whole emotionally charged history all over again to another doctor full of the same damn questions. Probably best not to get pregnant right now anyway, considering all that too. So all in good time. My only regret will be that any baby who finally makes it to my womb will miss out on the weekly rehearsals with RCCNY. I'd been looking forward to that.

I'm sure other questions will come up but it's after midnight now and I'm sinking deeper and deeper in between the flannel sheets. It's time.

city of angels, pt.2

DAY 2

Friday, June 8th. I was supposed to meet Mark at 9am in Santa Monica to look at a property, but there was no way that would happen after the late night. Also woke up groggy with that feeling of having been on antihistamines that ran out (which is exactly what was happening). Still, perked up a bit when Hana crisped up some thin-crust pizza for breakfast before heading out to her office. I spent the morning crafting follow-up/networking emails and such, then headed out into the perpetual LA sun.

The goal was to take a Culver City tour with Lisa (my best friend from high school), then have lunch at Meltdown with Matt, my friend-slash-(full disclosure) ex-boyfriend who’s a writer-slash-editor, then make chocolate chip cookies in time to join Mark at Elliot’s by 5:30pm for the chicken roast-off. Sounds easy. So why did it feel so hectic?

[EM note: wait… I decided after writing DAY 1 that this is far too detailed… so I will try to cut down on facts and focus more on impressions…]

Part of it was insisting on getting GOOD chocolate chips from Surfas, a chef’s gourmet supply store in Culver City. But ccc’s suck when the cc’s suck. Then there was hunting down the secret ingredient to making them crisp: corn syrup (ultimately “borrowed” from Matt and his wife Juliane – thank you!). And, picking up other ingredients at Trader Joe’s, and (recycled material) paper plates from Ralph’s… Ah, how easily one relearns the art of taking left turns through yellow lights, and the constant scanning for parking spots! But in the company of friends, it was all good.

Skipping to the party itself – the only thing I can compare it to, really, is a wedding. It was all family* and close friends (and close friends of close friends), many of whom we don’t get to see more than once a year, and tons of mouthwatering comfort food, and just barely enough time to spread the love. Mark has since regaled me with tales of struggling to cook ten chickens on the grill in time for dinner, but they pulled it off… ok, my mind just wandered off there remembering how YUMMY every juicy morsel of meat was. When the birds and the three-cheese mac’n’cheese** came out, it just turned into a free for all, and any hope of conducting a survey on organic vs. regular, honey-mustard vs. margarita went out the window.

But ultimately, the evening was a smashing success – we got dozens of people excited about the store, and willing to not only spread the word but look into real estate questions, offer business advice, etc. There was heated debate (?) as to what neighborhood needs this store the most (I think we’re leaning heavily toward the Bluestone Market model, not the Firebird Roasting Company) – and downtown has emerged as an up-and-coming contender. Through much of this, I was running around keeping freshly baked chocolate chip cookies coming from the oven and didn’t actually sit down to eat until long after the rush. Note to self: don’t let store turn into a restaurant….

Didn't crawl into bed until about 4:30amET again. But I think the "high" from the evening and most excellent meal blew the cold away.

*At least 10% of the guests (i.e. 3 out of 30) were pregnant; one was my sister-in-law Beth, who was about to pop any minute -- but still made it to the roast-off! The countdown continues....but not for long?!

**Cheeses this time were goat, Comte and cheddar.

P.S. Photo credit for top picture: Hana C. Ogawa.

and the winner is...

...we got a simple reply: "That's alright. You can stay until the end of February 08."

Mark replied: "Ok, thanks."

After all that angst... now I wish we'd sent the damn letter a long time ago! But then again, who knows how her state of mind at any point would affect her answer.

So at least for now, there is no rush to find a new home (or city!) this summer. And I'll have plenty of time (I think?) to start paring down our possessions for a move. The downside, of course, is that we could have used the savings -- especially with the business and IVF coming up, not to mention the unnerving layoffs starting to happen at both our companies.

One thing's for sure: story's far from over.

pic is of an iris in "our" front yard.

our opening move

So, we sent off a letter to our landlady and her brother. (Long story on why her brother is involved.) Essentially, we laid out two options. First: if they give us two months' rent, plus use our security deposit as our last months' rent, we would agree to leave as early as September 30th. Second: we would give them two months' notice as soon as we know when we can move, which may be as late as the end of our lease (end of February 2008).

September 30th may seem really far off, but seeing as it's already June, and that I'll most likely be in Japan for at least six weeks around August, Mark & I agreed that's the earliest sane option. Still makes my stomach turn to think about it, but if we get those months paid for, maybe we can hire real movers for a change.

Anybody care to hazard a guess on their response?

P.S. The pic is of our oft-flooded basement.

good question

Mark got an email from our landlady's brother this morning, asking (with no question mark, thank you): "Have you set your plans for moving."

Plans? What plans? ... Set plans??

They want to bring real estate people in ASAP. So now we'll have people coming in and out of the house all the time. Lovely.

pick a spot, any spot

Cast your vote by posting a comment to this entry. No holds barred...